In the comments under my last newsletter - I’m trying to remember that this is mostly a newsletter, not a blog! - I was talking with Luisa about KC Davis. KC has some strong ideas around managing ADHD and I’m an enthusiastic newcomer to her work.
In this podcast she talks about her methodology for getting shit done. She finds she’s able to stay ‘on task’ if one or more of the following are involved: Pleasure, Patterns (as opposed to routine), Projects and Pressure/Panic.
I’ve been musing on this - and relating strongly - as the year comes to a close. I’m finding that circumstances/The Universe/coincidence have decided to give me an end of term round-up. Kind of ‘So you learned lots of things this year, let’s see what stuck. Here are some prompts…’ And the prompts are short, sharp versions of the original lessons.
This is happening as astrologically we’re looking at a Big Week. Tomorrow, Jupiter returns to Aries until next May, I think (again, not an astrologer). This is a Jupiter Return for me, in my tenth house. All about professional/career type stuff. The tenth house, as an overarching thing not just mine, resonates with Capricorn energy. On Wednesday/Thursday, we have (and maybe celebrate) the solstice and the start of Capricorn season. On Friday we have a new moon, in yes…Capricorn.
One particular revisited lesson has been very MerGoat-y for me. This sign is ruled by Saturn and I’m in the last months of my second Saturn Return. Finally, the picture is coming together. I’ve always longed to be the sort of person who could live with discipline, devotion and intention; a plan with which to build. But my brain is made in such a way that instead I buzz around like a bee, around all the flowers, all the time, totally on a whim.
As I wrote recently, I’ve been given a reason to achieve a stronger, more focussed approach, and so to KC’s list, I would add Pain. Some of us just don’t can’t get it until it hurts. I’m learning to be okay with that.
Heading to 2023, I believe I’m finally ready and I know that this process will affect whatever I choose to do as I return to earning a living. Since 2015 it’s been about parenting (I’ve been a parent since 2006, obvs, but 2015 was when homeschooling became a plan) and then, also, daughtering. I’m less needed there now and can refocus on what’s to come for myself (oh why do I feel like writing that is tempting fate?!).
Then there is the vex subject of boundaries. Perhaps I just need to get back on my Yarrow essence that has helped so much in the past, but I’m also learning - short, sharp - that I am often held hostage by my emotions. I feel deeply and react quickly. No reasoning, just all the feeling, and it can throw me off kilter for days. Weeks. I appreciate that feeling your feelings is generally believed to be ‘a good thing’ but personally, moderation feels like a good goal.
So instead of React, I’m going for Reflect, Respond and Remember. No need to throw myself into the churning waters of some reactive feeling. I can reflect on what has pushed my buttons; respond in a considered way if it feels appropriate and then - because people and situations will show you who/what they are - remember.
(If you’re a Human Design person, I have emotional authority and yes, this is me learning how to ride those waves until they settle!)
My word for 2022 was ‘extraordinary’ and I had no bloody idea what I was setting in motion! So I shall be thinking about 2023, with some help from Susannah, and choosing a word to carry me forward.
If you’re celebrating anything over the next week, have a lovely time and whether you are or you’re not, thank you so much for giving me and my wild edges some of your precious time this year - I am eternally grateful, and wish you all a peaceful, fulfilling and contented 2023.
P.S. What’s your word? Do you have one yet?
xxx
I have emotional authority, too (no surprise there.) Once again I relate to so much here, especially the 5 P's (including yours) for keeping us on task. Your post also inspired me to do my process for finding my word RIGHT NOW 😅 And it surprised me: my word is FEEL. Not just as in 'feel your feelings' (I am with you, that's not always the most helpful approach) but more as in FEEL - truly, deeply, achingly - the beauty of life. Feel my aliveness and bring it out of the shadows into the light. I've been numbing so much this year, when this word revealed itself to me it was like a big sigh of relief... yes, that's it. Wishing you and your family a lovely festive week and looking forward to more of your musings for 2023 🥰❤️
No word yet. Pondering a color or a scent instead of a word. Maybe an essence or a tree? As much as I LOVE words, this next round feels like it needs to be anchored at a more body/sensory level.
Joyous week to you, too, if/whatever you're celebrating. <3